


Alleyways

by cbob13



Series: Make the Darkness Bright [2]
Category: Far Cry (Video Games), Far Cry 5
Genre: AU to Make the Darkness Bright, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, F/M, Homeless Jacob Seed, Homelessness, Kastle AU, Older Man/Younger Woman, Suicidal Thoughts, Tenderness, coffee shop AU, kastle - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-07-20 13:56:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16138676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cbob13/pseuds/cbob13
Summary: Jacob Seed was just some crazy war vet that lived out in the alley.  He didn't have anyone or anything.  If he died, the world might be a better place for it.  But the beautiful woman who works at the coffee shop gave him hope.  Watching her walk down the street is the only thing that keeps him from offing himself and he didn't even know her name.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone!! This is a little AU of my story, Make the Darkness Bright. It follows Jacob during his time when he was homeless, and my original character, Liz. You don;t have to have read that story to understand this one, but you should go check it out. I just wrote this as an excuse to write Jacob x Liz fluff. This doesn't have any effect on the original story and was written just for fun, enjoy :)

Watching the girl who worked at the coffee shop was the best part of Jacob’s day.  She would walk right past him down the street every morning.  Her golden hair flipping behind her.  She looked like an angel, free spirted and beautiful.  There was nothing carefree about her though.  There was always this look in her eyes, he wouldn’t go as far to describe it as fear. 

Her eyes were always _cautious._ Her head on a swivel at all times, looking for any threats.  One day he also spotted the outline of a handgun in her purse.  That was necessary when walking alone in the city as a woman.  One could never be too careful.

She never noticed him though.  It wasn’t shocking based on who he was.  Most people ignored the homeless.  They were treated like the scum of society.  His spot in the alley next to the coffee shop wasn’t exactly prime real estate either.  Jacob didn’t have anything.  Just a garbage bag full of junk.  After the war he had been thrown out on his ass.

He didn’t know where his brothers were.  The last time he saw them he had been 15.  He thought about them every day.  Sometimes he liked to imagine that they both got adopted by nice families.  But the reality was probably much harsher.  He would never get to see them again, he knew that.  Jacob would die sitting in this alley, with no one and nothing.

But that girl was the only thing that gave him hope.  He clung to that the idea of that girl like she was his lifeline.  She was the only thing that kept him from offing himself and he didn’t even know her name.

She was very beautiful.  She looked young too, far too young for how old she probably was.  There was always a smile on her face, which seemed genuine to the blind eye.  But anyone looking closer could see that the smile contrasted with the cautious eyes.

It wasn’t until about after a month of watching her that he finally saw her up close.

That day like all days, he had been curled up in his spot in the alley.  He hadn't been expecting a small foot to crush his hand completely.  A huff made its way past his lips.  He snatched his hand away from the ground. 

“Oh shit!  I’m so sorry.”

He looked up to meet the most beautiful pair of Hazel eyes he’d ever seen.  They were captivating.  Jacob found it hard to breathe for a moment.  He’d watched her for a long time and she was right there.  Blonde hair spilling over her shoulder.  Her work uniform was clean and neatly pressed.  She was so close that he could reach out and touch her if he wanted.

“Are you okay?”

There was concern all over her face, but her hand told a different story.  They contradicted one another.  Her hand was buried deep into a secret compartment in her purse.  No doubt wrapped around the gun she kept in it. 

He sighed.  “You gonna’ shoot me?” 

The sound of his own voice surprised him.  It had been a long time since he had even spoken.  His voice was weak and coarse.  Not strong and determined like it had once been.

The girl’s eyes grew wide.  She looked down to her purse to see what he had been implying.  She removed her hand from the gun.  Shame slowly crept over her, making blush rise in her cheeks.

“I’m… sorry.”  The girl quickly walked away.  She disappeared into the coffee shop.  She was gone as quickly as she came. 

He flexed his hand.  It hurt a little, but he was fine.  He had been through much worse pain in the war.  The small bruise that formed on his hand was nothing compared to the burn marks on his body.  A part of him wished that she had shot him.  She could have ended all his suffering.  He could finally be at peace.  But she hadn’t.  He got to live another miserable day on this Earth.

He spent the rest of the day thinking about the color of her eyes.  He put his hand back to where it had been earlier.  Maybe she would step on it again.

**…**

The next day Jacob woke later than he usually did.  It was late in the morning.  He didn’t like sleeping long.  Anyone could steal his small bit of possessions.  He didn’t have much.  Just a few bottles of water, scraps of food, and the green army jacket that he wore under his poncho.

He had missed seeing the girl walk to work.  He could help the feeling of disappointment in his gut.  The mysterious girl was the only good part of his day.  He didn’t know anything about her but liked knowing that she was safe. 

It became his mission to make sure she was okay.  It was his _purpose_.  Sometimes he would survey the area before she came to work to make sure that no one around would hurt her.  Not that he could physically do much in his state, but it gave him some sense of belonging.  It felt a lot like he was back in the Army again.

When he moved to sit himself up, his arm bumped into something.  Right beside him sat a coffee cup and a small paper bag.  He inspected both.  Inside the paper bag was a warm bagel.   The coffee was still warm as well.  It was uncommon for such a commodity to be out in the open.  This had to be some sort of trick. 

It wasn’t until he turned the cup around that he saw who it was from.  There was a message scribbled on the cup in black.  It read:

_Sorry I stepped on your hand yesterday…_

The girl who worked in the coffee shop left it for him.  His heart beat a little faster at the thought.  She had come outside to see him, and he hadn’t even been awake.  He took a sip from the coffee cup.  It tasted better than everything he had on a daily basis.

The girl had given him a small act of kindness.  He can’t remember the last time someone had done anything like that for him.  It made him feel like an actual human being again.

**…**

Everyday after that Jacob barely slept.  She didn’t work on the weekends, but each day he waited in anticipation for the girl to walk down the street.  Waiting was all he could do now.  So, that’s what he did.

It was only a few days after the incident until he saw her again.  She took the same route that she always did.  He was curled up on the ground with his knees clutched to his chest.  His head perked up at the familiar sound of her shoes clicking on the sidewalk. 

Her eyes locked onto his and she smiled.  It might have been the most precious thing he had seen in his life.  More pleasant to the eye than the snarls on his father’s face when he was beaten as a child.  Or the endless miles of sand in Iraq.  She smiled at _him._ He hadn’t expected or deserved such a kindness.  He was nobody.

Jacob felt a lot like a deer in headlights.  How was he supposed to return such a kind gesture?  He didn’t know what to do.  So, he just stared.  His eyes didn’t leave her even when she diverted hers to stare at the ground.  There was a bit of blush rising in her cheeks.  Not from shame this time, but from joy it appeared.  She quickly ran off into the coffee shop. 

He didn’t see her again until around lunchtime.  From the corner of his eye he saw her place another coffee cup and bag on the ground next to him.  He didn’t look up at her.  If he did he would just get lost. 

“Look… I’m really sorry about stepping on you the other day.”

There was still a bruise on his hand from where her foot had been.  She probably hadn’t meant to do it.  It hadn’t hurt that much. 

He stayed curled up in the alleyway.  The concrete ground had become familiar to him.  It was the only solid thing he knew.  He didn’t know what to say to this woman.  He didn’t know anything about her.  The only thing he knew was that she was far too good for the scum of the Earth like him.

“Well, I hope this makes up for it a little bit.  Have a good day, sir.”

No one had called him sir in a long time.  It was a title only meant for those who were respected.  Jacob didn’t deserve that title.  He was just some crazy war vet who would kill himself sooner or later.

He raised his head to look at her at the sound of it.  But by the time he did, she was already gone.  He had missed her again.  There was that feeling of disappointment again.  He just hadn’t wanted to get lost in her eyes.  They were so easy to get lost in.

The coffee cup sitting next to him was larger than the last time.  He didn’t want her pity, but it was nice that she thought of him.  His life had been very lacking in that area.  He turned the cup around to see another note written in black sharpie.

_Liz :)_

Jacob finally knew the name of the mysterious girl at the coffee shop.  Her liked that name.  It suited her.

**…**

Liz came to visit him everyday that week.  During her lunch break she would come outside with a coffee and some sort of food in hand.  She would sit them down on the ground next to him.  She would linger for a moment and then leave when he wouldn’t look at her.

He still didn’t know what to say to her.  Liz was probably the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen.  He was just the piece of garbage that lived out in the alley.

Did she pity him?  Was that the only reason for her constant visits?  There was no other reason he could think of.  He didn’t want her pity, or anyone else’s.  He just wanted something; a mission, a purpose, an ending.  Looking out for her was a thing that he did to pass the time.  That was just something that he played over in his head.  He didn’t know her.  If he was any smarter he would just let it go.

But with each passing day he tried to figure out what to say.  It took him a while, but he finally figured it out.  That day he saw her walk by in the morning.  She gave him the same smile that she did every morning.  That smile that made him feel confused and terrified inside.

At lunchtime that day she brought out another coffee cup and bag of food.  He could see her form the corner of his eye.

“You ever going to talk to me?” She asked.

That seemed to be the question of the week.  It was the thing he would ask himself every day.  Jacob didn’t know why he couldn’t do it.  She seemed very nice.  She had apologized profusely for stepping on him. 

When he still didn’t say anything, she began to walk away.  He didn’t want to watch her go again.  He panicked and forgot everything that he had planned to say.  He blurted out the first thing that was on his mind.

“What do you carry in your purse?”

She turned her head to him.  He finally looked up at her.  Her hair was pulled back into a tight bun.  There were a million coffee stains on her uniform.  Dark circles were under her eyes, probably from work or school, or both.  She was no less beautiful because of it.

“What?”

“What type of gun do you carry?”  It was a daunting question to ask.  She might not even carry a gun.  But he was sure that was what her hand had been wrapped around that day. 

A smile tugged at her lips.  Not like the sweet one that she wore every morning.  This one had more confidence behind it.  One that surprised him.  Like she had wanted someone to ask her about it.

“A .380”

That only made perfect sense.  .380’s were small and easy to conceal.  A perfect gun for a woman in the city. 

“You always carry that in your purse?”

Her smile grew.  She lifted them hem of her shirt slightly to reveal a black handgun sitting at her hip.  It was tucked into a holster for concealed carry. 

“Not always in my purse.  Sometimes I carry it _other_ places.”  She talked to him almost as if he was a friend.  She didn’t know anything about him though.

His eyes lingered too long on the smooth skin on her hip.  A little too long.  He barely even looked at her gun.  She had grown uncomfortable by his staring and released her shirt.  It covered the gun from his view.

“You old enough to carry that thing?”

“Yeah.  I know how to use it too.  So, don’t be trying anything.”

He scoffed.  “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

Jacob clutched his knees closer to his chest.  He stared at the brick wall across from him.  He had to admit that he felt a little bit pathetic in his current state.  He had been well-respected in the Army.  He had led his own unit and respected by his men.  Until the day that he wasn’t.  The Army threw him away just like everyone else.  This woman though, had so much power over him.  She could do anything to him and he probably wouldn't bat an eye.

“Look… I wasn’t going to shoot you the other day.  I’m really sorry I made you think that.”  She fidgeted with her hands, clearly thinking that she had done something wrong.

“It’s alright.”  He looked back up at her.  He couldn’t remember the last time he had to reassure someone of something.  Most of the time he couldn’t even reassure himself of things.

“Okay.”  Her smile slowly came back.  “Oh, and what should I call you?”

That question threw him.  Why did she care what his name was?  He was worthless.  He was just a piece of shit that society spat on.  But to his own surprise, he answered her.

“Seed.”  That name was familiar.  That was what they used in the Army.  It was the name that was on his jacket.

“Well, have a nice day Mr. Seed.  I’m sure I’ll see you around.”  She left after that.

Jacob hadn’t realized that he had been holding one of his wrists so tight, that it lacked blood flow.  His heart had been beating out of his chest.  He flexed it to regain the color in his hand.  He looked forward to seeing Liz again.  She was probably the only good thing in his life right now. 

He let his head rest against the brick wall of the coffee shop.  The ground beneath him didn’t feel as hard.  That shit feeling in his stomach wasn’t there.  And for the first time in a long time, Jacob felt somewhat at peace.


	2. Chapter 2

“Here I brought you this.”

Liz extended him the black blanket that sat in her hands.  It looked waterproof and _expensive._ Something that she probably couldn’t afford with her terrible coffee shop salary. 

“I don’t want that.”  Most of all, he didn’t want her pity.  He needed to be strong.  Strength was the most important.  Plenty of people probably pitied him anyways.  He didn’t need her added to that list.

“Please just take it.” Her eyes were pleading with him.

He grabbed it from her hands and tucked it into his poncho for safe keeping.  If it had been anyone but her, he would have thrown it back in their faces.  But he couldn’t say no to her even if he tried.

“I have to go to work.  See you later.”

Liz didn’t come back out until lunchtime.  She brought her typically offering.  He meant to ask her how she was getting him all this food, but the thought slipped his mind.  He hoped that she wasn’t paying for it herself.  She had already done too much for him.  Far more than he deserved.

She spread out the blanket she brought him earlier and sat down on the ground beside him.  Her head rested against the brick wall.  Jacob’s eyes grew wide.  She was so close to him.  Closer than she had ever been to him.

“What?  You didn’t think this for you was it?”  She gave him a toothy grin.

Time for him stood still for a moment.  Her eyes grew wide.  And the dimples in her cheeks were clear as day.  He wished that he could stare at that smile forever.  He had been staring too long and diverted his eyes to the ground. He didn’t know how to respond to her jokes.  It wasn’t something that was common to him.  He changed the subject.

“You still got that hand-canon on you?”

Guns were the one thing that he knew.  That he could talk about.  They were solid, simple.  They were always the most essential part of any mission.

“Always, Seed.”

His chest tightened at hearing his name again.  He tried to stop his voice from cracking when he opened his mouth.  “That’s good.  Keep it loaded, but don’t take the safety off till ya’ need it.”

Her eyebrow quirked.  “You sure know a lot about guns.  You used to be a cop or something?”

“Something like that…”

“So, how did you end up out here?”  She turned her head to the side to look at him.  It wasn’t shocking that she was asking that.  How did he end up homeless?  That was a story that he didn’t have time to tell. 

“Just shitty luck, that’s all.”  It was the truth.  He hadn’t asked for his father to beat him, or to get sent to terrible foster parents, or to get sent off to war.  Jacob ended up in this situation all due to bad luck, that was all there was to it.

“Oh…  That must really suck.”

He noticed that Liz was extremely blunt.  She would say anything that was on her mind, despite the consequences it might have.  That might have been part of the reason she was talking to him in the first place.  He was just thankful that she didn’t say that she was sorry.

She didn’t pity him.  That was something.  It made him feel like his old self a little bit.  The part of himself that had died in the desert and left him as the hollow shell of the man he used to be.

“Yeah… It does.”

**…**

Their talks became more frequent.  It had been two weeks since she had stepped on his hand.  They had some interaction every day since then.  That bruise on his hand had been one of the best things that had ever happened to him. 

The other day, Liz had acquired two beaten down lawn chairs.  She had silenced his concerns when she said she stole them from a dumpster.  He just didn’t want her to waste her money.  Not when he didn’t deserve it…

“How’d your test go?”  He mostly let her do the talking.  She vented to him about school and work.  He didn’t mind.  He just liked the sound of her voice.  It calmed his weary soul.

“Umm… Not that good.  I probably didn’t study as much as I should have.”  She sheepishly looked at the ground.

“You need to take that shit seriously… or else you’ll end up like me.” 

What happened to Jacob, hadn’t been because of his choices.  But he still didn’t want anything like this to ever happen to her.  She deserved so much more.  Much more than someone to talk to who lived in the garbage.

She opened her mouth to speak but was cut off.

“Palmer!”

A large burly man rounded the corner from the coffee shop.  He was short, plump, and had a large beer belly.  The man had been shouting what he assumed was Liz’s last name.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing, Palmer?”

“I’m making friends.”

His head perked up at the sound of that.  Were they friends?  They talked almost every day, but it was just small talk.  And she did most of the talking.  He liked the sound of that though.  Jacob could really use a friend in his life right now.

“I don’t pay you to make friends.  I pay you to serve lattes.”

“You barely pay me at all.” She spat.

“You want less?  Because I can make that happen.”

Her nose scrunched up in anger.  Her hands gripped the edge of the lawn chair.  Most of the time she looked like a peaceful _little lamb._ But in her current state she looked like a wolf.  Like she was about to unload her sidearm into the poor chump.

“No.  I don’t want less.”

“That’s what I thought.  It’s fine when you flirt with the men to get more tips, but this is too much.  I don’t want you talking with this piece of trash.  I don’t want his kind hanging around here.”

Jacob wasn’t surprised that the man had called him trash.  That was how most people talked about him.  Liz was the kind exception, not the rule.  He was always calm when people talked to him like that.  There wasn’t much he could do.  But sometimes he wished he could have met them when he had been at his peak.  There were a lot of things he would have liked to do to those people.  To beat their faces in until they were begging him to stop…

Anger flashed across her face.  “Why does it matter what I do during my lunchbreak, jackass?  I’m not getting paid for this hour.”

“Because you’re sitting on company property, that’s why.  And you better watch your mouth young lady.”

Liz snatched her chair up and moved it, so it wasn’t touching the brick wall anymore.  She stood up to confront the man.  Jacob just sat there in his chair, with his hands tucked into his poncho.

“Now I’m not on company property, I’m on city property.  You gonna’ call the cops on me, asshole?  Because that wouldn’t end well for you.  Without me, your whole business would practically collapse.  So, what’s it’ll be?”

The man sized her up and down.  A scowl crossed his face.  “Your break ends in 15 minutes.  If you’re not back inside before then, consider yourself fired.”  He kicked over Jacob’s coffee all over him before going back inside.

“Fuck you!” Liz screamed.

Jacob just sat there with hot coffee covering his tattered boots.  It was like being back in basic training.  He couldn’t talk back and couldn’t fight, he just had to take it.  That was all he was doing in life right now, taking what was given to him without complaint.

But Liz, he would never complain about her.  He still didn’t know everything about her, but she was probably the best thing to happen to him in a long time.  Her and being friends with Miller.  And the more he thought about it, the more he realized that those two were so alike.  They both said whatever the hell was on their minds and they both tried to fight people that they had no chance at winning against.  And Miller used to have those cautious eyes that she had.  It might be part of the reason he had been so drawn to her from the beginning.

She sat back down in the lawn chair.  “I’m sorry about my boss, he’s kind of a jackass.”

“Why do you put up with that?”

“Because I have to.  Can’t find another job.  It doesn’t matter anyways, I can deal with it.”  She brushed it off.  The problem seemed a lot bigger than that though.

“He’s weak.  He shouldn’t get to be where he is.”  If it were up to Jacob, that man would be dead.  He would be in a shallow grave with everyone else on this planet who was weak.

“Yeah… I agree, but there’s nothing I can do.”

“You should kill him.  It’d be nice to see that bastard’s brains all over the sidewalk.” 

As soon as the words left his mouth, he desperately wished he could take them back.  His solution was an effective one, but he forgot who he was talking to.  He had been treating her like she was a fellow soldier, like she was Miller.  His precious little lamb though didn’t think about things like killing.  She was too good, too pure.  He wouldn’t wish those thoughts on her. 

Her eyes grew wide.  She did her best to hide her fear but failed.  Her hands gripped the chair a little tighter.

“I’m not going to do that.”  There was panic all over her face.

“Look… I…”

“I think I should go.”  Liz stood up from the chair and brushed herself off.  She handed him the rest of the food she had been eating and disappeared from his view.

He let the bag fall from his hand and hit his boots.  They were still covered by his coffee that had been kicked on him.  His breathing became shallow.  He spoke so soft that only he could hear it.

“Please don’t…”

**…**

The next morning Jacob had been awake earlier than usual.  Nightmares had plagued him the whole night.  It wasn’t uncommon occurrence but still an unpleasant one.  Nothing about life was easy anymore.

Jacob leaned against the brick wall of the coffee shop.  The blanket she had given him was wrapped around his head and shoulders.  He was actually standing for once.  That was something that he never did.  But he needed to talk to her, to set things right.  He had everything planned out, or at least he thought he did.

After about an hour of waiting, she finally appeared on the street.  She kept her head down.  Headphones sat in her ears.  She was being stupid.  Not being aware was how most women were attacked.  She was smarter than this.

When she got close enough to him, he put his hand out to grab her arm.  His grip wasn’t tight enough to harm but enough to get her attention.  It was the first time he had touched her.  He wished it had been something a little gentler than this.

Her head perked up from the sidewalk.  Her face fell when she realized it was him.  She removed her headphones from her ears and put them in her purse.

“You trying to get yourself killed, _little lamb_?”  The nickname had accidentally slipped out.  He couldn’t stop himself.  That’s not what she had looked like when she had been staring down her boss.  But the name suited her though.

She snatched her arm away from his grip.  “I’m fine.  And I told you my name’s Liz.”  She began to walk away.

“I’m sorry.”  He couldn’t even remember what he was sorry about.  He just didn’t want her to be upset.  That hadn’t been his plan.

She turned back to face him.  Her eyes looked sad, almost pained.  “It’s okay.  I sort of overreacted yesterday.”

“You did the right thing.  And… I don’t think you should come out here anymore.”

“No… But…”  Her expression became even more pained.

“You can’t lose your job over me.  Don’t come out here, Liz.”

She nodded her head.  That was how it had to be.  She was just too good for someone like him.  He still didn’t know why she wanted to be friends with him anyways.  He was just trouble.  Anywhere he went, shit followed.

“You were in the Army?”

He was confused by her question only until he looked down to see his Army jacket in full view.   His poncho had fallen down his shoulders.  He pulled the blanket tighter so that it covered his clothing.

“What’s the _J_ stand for?”

She had seen the name on his jacket.  Shit.  The less she knew about him, the better.  He stayed silent.

“Fine.  Don’t tell me.  I’ll figure it out.  Oh and Seed, you don’t get to tell me what to do.”

**…**

Jacob almost fell out of his chair one afternoon when a pile of papers hit his lap.  He looked up to see Liz standing over him, arms folded across her chest.

“You didn’t tell me that you were a goddamn war hero, _Jacob._ ”

He inspected the papers she put in his lap.  It was a print out of an Army recruitment website.  At the top of the page it read: _Jacob Seed, 82 nd Airborne._

“Didn’t think I’d figure out your name did ya’?”

There was a record of all his deployments and when he was discharged.  It also had a picture of himself at eighteen years old, when he first enlisted.  He had been baby-faced and beardless at the time.  It seemed like it was only yesterday but that was very long ago.  He wasn’t eighteen anymore.

“It says that you were injured and decorated several times, earned a shit ton of medals.  That you served in Iraq, Afghanistan, and that you were essentially a _badass._   How the hell did you end up here, Jacob?”

He gathered up the papers and gestured for her to take them.  “I told you, shitty luck.”

Liz just stood there.  “It also says you’re dead.”

He inspected the papers closer and discovered that she was correct.  It said that Jacob Seed had died in 1997.  But he wasn’t dead, he was very much alive.  The Army had discharged him, then written him off as dead.  That’s why his money had stopped coming. 

“Where did you find this?”

Her typically cocky smile crossed her face.  “It only takes one internet search to find anything nowadays.  I didn’t think I’d find you, since you wouldn’t tell me your name.  I had to search through a lot of J. Seed’s; James, John, Joseph…”

His eyes grew wide at the mention of his brother’s names.  “Did you find anything on John and Joseph?”

The smile on her face faded into confusion.  “Um… I mean I didn’t really look that hard but there were probably some things.  Why?  Who are they?”

“My little brothers.”

“Damn.  No, I didn’t see anything about them.  But I can look again.  Do you want to help me?”

He looked up at her.  There would be nothing more in the world he wanted more.  He just wanted to be reunited with John and Joseph.  Nothing would make him happier.

**…**

He felt like a stranger in the fancy apartment building.  The lights were too bright, the walls too clean.  It might not be something fancy to Liz, but it sure was to him.  She had insisted the he go with her.  She said that she wouldn’t be able to recognize his brothers is she saw them.

That’s how he ended up in an elevator with Liz and some squirrely man at least two feet shorter than him.  The man kept sparing glances their way.  He clutched his grocery bag a little tighter like it would run away from him, or be stolen from him…

“Can I help you?” Liz asked him.

He shook his head.  “Nope.  Just admiring your choice in friends.”

The man gave Jacob another dirty look.  It was a mix between disgust and fear.  The later was probably due to his stature.  Back in the day, people had taken one look at him and ran in the other direction.  They did it today too.  Now, he just didn't know if it was due to his height or where he lived.

“What, I’m not allowed to have friends?”

He scoffed and shook his head.  “Sure… But ya’ know Liz, I didn’t pick you as one to sleep around with the garbage.”

A scowl grew over her face.  She jammed her hand in her purse and pulled out her .380, the color seemed to drain from the squirrely man’s face. 

“Get the fuck out of here, Jerry.”

The elevator came to a stop at what was probably his floor.  He practically ran away from the small girl holding a gun.  “Crazy ass bitch.”  He yelled.

She gave Jacob a cocky smile and placed the gun back in her purse.  There had been something strange about the way she had been holding the gun.  Almost like it had been too light.

When the elevator came to a stop again, he followed her like he was a lost puppy.  She unlocked her door and they stepped inside her apartment. 

The door closed behind them along with several bolt locks.  There were at least four locks on her door.  He finally felt like he could breathe.  It was the first time they were alone together though.  He didn’t know how he felt about it.

“Sorry about that guy.  He’s a dumbass.”  She placed her coat on a chair.  Her work uniform had its traditional stains, but this was the first time he noticed how it clung to her body.  He shook the thoughts from his head.  He wasn’t here for that.

“You shouldn’t have pulled your gun on him.”  It had come out a little more forceful than he meant it to be.  There he went scolding her just like she was his responsibility.  Like she had been Miller.

She shook her head.  “I’m sorry, but he’s a little shit.  I didn’t want him looking down at you like that.”

“Give me your gun.”

She was hesitant.  She clearly didn’t trust him that much.  After a moment she reached back into her purse and placed the .380 in his hand.  It was much lighter than it should be.  He let the magazine fall into his hand to discover that it was empty.

“You don’t keep it loaded?”

“No… It’s just to scare people…”

“That’s how you get killed.”  It didn’t matter if someone was scared by her tool.  An unloaded gun wouldn’t protect her when the shit hit the fan.

“Why do you care what happens to me?”  She spat.

He just wanted to protect her.  He might not know her that well, but he didn’t have anyone else.  No one in this world gave a shit about him except for Liz.

“Why do you care about me?” He asked.

Her mouth pressed into a thin line.  When she didn’t say anything; he handed her back the gun and tried to make his way to the door.  She caught his hand before he could.  It was a very simple touch, but one that made his heart beat ten times faster.

“You’re easy to talk to.  You listen to me.  And you’re my friend, Jacob.  I don’t want anybody looking down on you.”

Jacob couldn’t remember the last time someone had willingly touched him.  His father had beaten him, field medics had cleaned his wounds, and Miller had hugged him once.  But none of those touches were like this.  Especially one that was as gentle as the way she held his hand. 

He didn’t deserve a touch as soft and caring as this.  He wasn’t a good man.  He had killed unarmed men, beaten captives until they choked on their own blood, and bulldozed men into the dirt, all in the name of his country.  She was too good to be touching him.  If she touched him too much, her hands would become tainted red like his were.

Having a friend was something else that was uncommon in his life.  The only people he had ever considered to be his friends were John, Joseph, and Miller.  The former two were missing or dead and the latter… Well, he knew what happened to him.

Liz’s fingers intertwined with his.  Her hand was so much smaller than his.  He knew what this was.  She was trying to be nice, calm him down.  But he couldn’t handle it.  He pulled his hand away from hers.

She let out a sigh.  “Let’s find your brothers.”

She walked over to a computer in the corner of her apartment.  He hadn’t even bothered looking around her place.  It was small but nice.  Much nicer than anywhere he had ever lived.  It was a bit of mess.  There were textbooks and fast food bags strewn about.

The mess would have made him a little uncomfortable in the past.  Before he was homeless, he had always liked things neat and tidy.  That was a result from his time in the Army.  But now he didn’t care.  His spot in the alleyway of the coffee shop was nicer than most places.  Beggars couldn’t be choosers.

She sat at her computer typing away.  He wasn’t very big on technology.  In his experience, it hurt society more than it helped it.

While she was on her computer, he became distracted by her keys that were sitting next to her.  He only focused on one keychain.  It was a cut off rabbit’s foot with a metal wolf at the top.  It wasn’t what he would expect to be on her keys. 

Before he could stop himself, he pointed to it.  “What’s the rabbit’s foot?”

Her head turned from the computer.  “Oh, that just something that my Uncle Eli got me forever ago.  He’s kind of a survivalist nut.  I think you’d like him.”

For some reason, Jacob highly doubted that.  He had nothing against the man, but Jacob wasn’t very good at making friends.  Most people ran away from him instead of towards him.

Liz unclipped the rabbit foot from her keys.  She held it out to him.  “You can have it if you want.”

When he didn’t say anything, she wagged her finger at him.  “Come here.”

He bent down slightly to match her height.  There was a big smile on her face.  She gently grabbed the chain of his dog tags and pulled them out from under his poncho.  She clipped the rabbit’s foot to the chain.

“My uncle always said that this thing would protect me.  But now it’ll protect you.”

He didn’t care about being protected.  He could die for all he cared.  He just wanted her to be safe.  But he accepted the gift without question.  It was kind of nice to be given something.

Liz was still holding onto the chain.  He hadn’t realized that he had been staring at her lips for too long.  Every time he looked at her it was always for too long.  He stood back up to his full height.  Her hands fell from him.

“Umm… Thank you.”

She gave him a small smile before turning back to her computer.  “Okay so who do you want to search for first?  Joseph or John?”

“Joseph.”  He would be the easiest to recognize.  He had known Joseph well.  He remembered John only being a baby when he had been taken away to juvy.

A few clicks later and she pulled up an entire list of ‘Joseph Seeds’.  He could only make out so much from the small pictures, but he didn’t see his brother.  Liz stood up from the chair.

“You can sit and look through.  I’m going to go take a shower.  Make yourself at home.  Oh, and shout if you need me.”  She left him to himself and the computer.  After a few minutes he heard the water running.  She had left the bathroom door open.  He didn’t know if that it was an invitation or just out of concern.  He didn’t really care.

Jacob just stood there.  He didn’t sit down at the computer.  What was wrong with him?  He desperately wanted to find his brothers.  But he couldn’t force himself to sit down at the computer and look for them.

A part of him didn’t want to look because he didn’t want to find his brother living a successful life, without him.  A life that he didn’t get to be a part of.  But that wasn’t it.  He knew the real reason.  It was because he knew he wouldn’t find his brothers on there.  He might not even recognize them as adults and that ashamed him most of all.  He wasn’t a part of his little brothers lives.  He didn’t know how they managed without him, where they lived, or even what they looked like.

He made a break for the exit.  Leaving Liz like this was the last thing he wanted to do, but he couldn’t take it.  It was all too much.  He walked over to the window and opened the latch.  He climbed over the edge and shut it behind him.  It didn’t take him long to make his way down the fire escape and back onto the street.

His spot by the coffee shop was only a few blocks away.  He buried his hands in his pockets as he walked.  When he got back to the alley he saw the worst possible scenario.

The dumpster was gone, along with the two lawn chairs and his garbage bag.  It was all gone.  And in its place stood two cops.  There were stern looks on their faces.  They were only there because of him.  The owner of the coffee shop didn’t want him hanging around.  He knew what would happen next.

Jacob sighed and turned in the other direction.  He didn’t know where he would go next, but he couldn’t stay there anymore.  He couldn’t see Liz ever again…

As he walked away from the alleyway, he clutched the rabbit’s foot in his hand.  It was the only thing he had of hers.  It had protected her.  Maybe it would protect him too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my wonderful readers! Hope y'all enjoyed the second chapter of my little AU. There's only 1 chapter left to this and then I'll go back to writing ch 16 of mtdb!  
> Also I'm back at with the Kastle parallels ~sigh~ I just couldn't help myself. I just needed Jacob Seed lookin all rough with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders.  
> And I couldn't write any Jacob x Liz fic without him calling her 'little lamb' at least once ;)

**Author's Note:**

> The next two chapters will be posted within a few days. I was just really excited to post this. 
> 
> This is kind of inspired by the ship Kastle. Which is Karen Page and Frank Castle from the show 'The Punisher'. This is sort of inspired by the scene in episode 2 of that show where Frank pretends to be homeless. And there are other tidbits are inspired by that ship as well.
> 
> I have not given up on, Make the Darkness Bright, just in case anyone was worried, lol. I just needed a small break to write something a little fluffier. After I finish this, which will be soon, I'll go back to working on mtdb.


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